Prank
by Jordanna Morgan
Summary: There's typical rookie hazing… and then, there's Zapp Renfro.


**Title:** Prank  
**Author:** Jordanna Morgan  
**Archive Rights:** Please request the author's consent.  
**Rating/Warnings:** G.  
**Characters:** Steven, Leo, Zapp, Klaus.  
**Setting:** Soon after Leo's recruitment into Libra.  
**Summary:** There's typical rookie hazing… and then, there's Zapp Renfro.  
**Disclaimer:** They belong to Yasuhiro Nightow. I'm just playing with them.  
**Notes:** Written for the prompt word "Advice" at Fan Flashworks.

* * *

There wasn't nearly enough coffee at Libra headquarters for the scene Steven Starphase walked into that morning.

"Are you telling me I nearly _died_ over a stupid _prank_?"

"Yeah, well, it's your own fault for being a _dumbass_. The moment you got a look at the neighborhood, I figured you'd have enough sense to turn around and run the other way. What are those freak-eyes of yours even _good_ for if you don't _pay attention_ to what they see?"

Zapp Renfro and an incongruously pajama-clad Leonardo Watch stood in front of Klaus von Reinherz's desk, looking like a pair of children called to the principal's office after a fight. Indeed, Leo very much appeared to have freshly _been_ in a fight: his pajamas were torn, his face marred with bruises and abrasions, his wildly gesturing hands cut and scraped with defensive wounds. By contrast there was not a scratch on Zapp, but that was hardly an indicator for someone as efficiently lethal as he was. He stood with arms crossed and eyes rolling, while the young rookie was almost apoplectic with rage.

Between the two, Steven glimpsed Klaus sitting forward attentively in his chair, fingers steepled on the desk. His expression was calm and mild-mannered as always, but Steven had known him long enough to read the subtle sparkling of green eyes over neutrally pursed lips.

Klaus was desperately trying not to _laugh_.

"What seems to be the problem here?" Steven asked firmly, announcing his approach.

The two warring parties turned. Before either Klaus or Zapp could open their mouths, Leo began spouting a verbal geyser of indignation.

"Mr. Steven… This _lunatic_ almost got me _killed_!" A violent hand-wave at Zapp. "When he offered to give me some advice on how to get around the city, he said Mr. Klaus had asked him to do it—and I thought I could _trust_ him. I'm still _new_ here, so it's not like I knew Shalloweed Square was—!"

In an instant the matter become entirely serious to Steven. He raised his hand. "Wait. What _about_ Shalloweed Square?"

Ignoring a completely inappropriate snort from Zapp, Leo squirmed from one foot to the other. "When _Zapp_ was taking me on his little tour, he told me the places that show up in red letters on the mass transit systems have a thirty percent higher survival rate for humans. So since I needed a new apartment, now that I have a permanent job here, I thought…"

Steven put a hand over his face. He couldn't help himself. "You thought _Shalloweed Square_ would be a good place to live?"

Leo swiftly turned defensive. "Hey, like I said, I didn't _know_ any better! It didn't look scary at first. Maybe kinda run down, but I was expecting I'd have to settle for that on my budget. And the rates on the signs advertising places for rent were actually pretty good."

That prompted Steven to stare at the rookie between his fingers. "Signs aren't even written in English down there. You could _read_ them?"

"Uh… yeah?" Leo's eyebrows hiked up with an evident surprise of his own, just barely short of popping his eyes open. "I guess I didn't realize they _weren't_ in English."

_Those eyes._ Steven dropped his hand, resisting an incredulous shake of his head. _I don't know if this kid is pathetic or terrifying. …Maybe Zapp wasn't wrong in saying he can look at something and not really _understand _what he sees._

"I take it you've since been informed that at destinations flagged in red, the human survival rate is actually thirty percent _lower_," he said slowly.

"That's what Mr. Klaus just told me," Leo muttered. "…Anyway, my new next-door neighbors waited until I'd unpacked and gone to bed before they tried to _feed me to their young_."

The last matter-of-fact summation was delivered with a murderous scowl at Zapp, who most likely would have been a sticky smear on the floor if Leo had laser-eyes instead of all-seeing ones. Even with his eyelids habitually closed, he had a remarkably expressive face.

As it was, instead of being scorched or even mildly chastised, Zapp merely sniggered and shrugged. "C'mon, at least I hung around to bail you out once I realized you'd _actually_ tried to move in. Can't you take a joke?"

"All my _stuff_ is still there in the middle of a nest of walking carnivorous plants! _That is not a joke_!"

Heaving a sigh, Steven verbally interjected himself between the two. "Alright, that's enough. Zapp, since you were responsible for the loss of Leo's belongings, you need to go and retrieve them." He leveled a firm stare of his own at the errant agent. "_Now_, please."

Zapp did not seem put out in the least by this assignment. Of course, considering he was one of the few humans in town who could take on the worst of Shalloweed Square any day of the week, an excursion there probably sounded less like a chore and more like a potential opportunity for sport.

"The look on the noob's face was still _totally_ worth it," he murmured smugly, slouching past Steven on his way out of the office. At the door he passed Gilbert Altstein; the butler smiled a greeting at Steven through his bandages, and halted attentively beside the desk with a first-aid kit in his hands.

Another sigh, and Steven turned to the still quietly fuming Leo. "Let me give you a piece of _real_ advice. Never fully believe anything Zapp has to say until you've confirmed it with a second source."

"Yeah, I think I've figured _that_ one out by now," Leo grumbled gloomily.

"Alright. Now let Gilbert take care of those wounds and fix you some tea. I know you must have had a rough night. If you want to, you can crash on the sofa in my office until Zapp gets back with your clothes."

Leo appeared to soften just a little at that. He raised his head, and the faintest trace of an appreciative smile curved his lips. "Thanks, Mr. Steven."

Escorted by Gilbert, Leo left the room, and Steven turned to Klaus. Through it all, he had remained a silent and faintly amused-looking observer.

"You still think bringing that kid on board is a good idea?" Steven asked pointedly.

A mild shrug. "He hasn't backed down from the job himself, has he? I'm willing to continue giving him the benefit of the doubt."

"You do realize that sometimes stubbornness is only _foolishness_ instead of courage."

"I think Leonardo is far from being a fool. He simply wants to have faith in others." The larger man's expression became earnest and thoughtful. "That's a rare quality in this city, Steven. I'm curious to see what it may contribute to our line of work."

"Assuming he doesn't get himself killed first."

"We'll simply have to make sure he doesn't—until he learns to have some faith in _himself_." Klaus smiled pensively. "When that day comes, I still believe he may surprise us."

…Steven was _definitely_ going to need more coffee.

* * *

_2019 Jordanna Morgan_


End file.
